Finding Me Pt 3

Finding My Owner

(This really won’t make much sense unless you’ve read the earlier posts!)

I was celibate for two solid years. In that time, I wore out at least a couple of expensive vibrators and one large dildo. I tore up my slave collar and leather cuffs by leaving them on too much when I was playing with myself in the bathtub!

For two years, I tried to pretend I was owned and went home to him every night. I tried to live in that imaginary world where I was some man’s toy and wondered how I would perform. Their day was my day. I tried to figure out where I would fit in and what I would do for him as I went about my day.

I had my rules and rituals and performed them daily, just to myself, hoping I would one day impress that special Master in waiting with my desires and my skills to serve.

After the new year, some of the girls from college who pretended to be friends invited me along on a ten-day “all girls” vacation to Phoenix with an end of vacation to Hollywood and the famous beaches of southern California. I had not taken a vacation for two years, so my boss gave it to me without questions. Just a “Go Have Fun Girl!”

From day one, I could tell I was there because they knew I was in their sorority and could pay my own way. That was it. Again, the pity parade for the fat chick. But I had my own backup plan. I had an invite to one of the BDSM clubs in Phoenix.

Phoenix had a reputation as one of the best cities in the nation for kink.

On day three, I went to a private location. They interview you and then have an orientation before they open the Magic Kingdom! This is back when you needed to know someone who knew someone who sized you up before letting you in.

When it was time for the tour, I was so wet between the legs, nervous, and super excited. I was 1800 miles away from almost anyone who knew me. I was in a new world where I could do anything without the care of someone I knew finding out.

My escort was a petite Asian girl wearing a leather collar and a leather under-boob bra, leaving her pierced nipples out for the world to see, and a couple of times, people she knew came by and pulled on them. She loved it as she smiled at me.

That was all she wore, other than a tiny pair of red lace panties where you could see she was bare down there and had piercings on her pussy lips with a chain dangling down. I was enjoying just following her, wanting to be her.

She was about to take me into the big room when I needed a potty break. As I walked out of the ladies’ room, drying my hands, I didn’t notice this hunk of a handsome, leather-clad man heading into the men’s room. Like the clutz that I am, I ran him over. I mean, I plowed into him and didn’t really stop until I realized I had knocked Him over onto the ground!

I apologized profusely as I helped him get up. He smiled and introduced himself. My guide explained who I was and told him what we were doing, always calling him “Sir.” She was a true submissive in her speech, and I loved it.

He told her to move along and that he would finish the tour. I thought I had died and gone to heaven. It had to be a dream. One of the hottest men in the building wanted to spend time showing this fat chick from the Midwest around the dungeon.

As he walked me around and showed me all the equipment, some of the hottest women I have ever seen, dressed in kinky clothing, came up to hug him or to say hi to him and beg for some time on the cross with him.

As we finished, he told me he was on his way out when I ran him over. He wanted to go across the street to a restaurant to unwind and have something to eat, and I was welcome to join him.

Somewhere over Dinner, it came out that I was on a sabbatical from Men and Masters. I was tired of the games. I am out of town and thought I would dip my toe here where nobody knows me and see what happens. That was it. That is all I told him.

He looked at me, smiled, and told me in no uncertain terms that If I was looking to score myself a hunky little kinky plaything while on vacation, he doesn’t play like that. Want to fuck? Maybe some other stuff? Maybe. or we could sit here and talk.

I was silent. I then asked him what he was looking for and why he was there, dressed like he was going to round up a little plaything to take back to his dungeon.

He laughed. Telling me the Phoenix BDSM community is very open and friendly and more like a family. So many of his friends were there playing and checking it out the scenery.

He isn’t interested in a girlfriend/slave. He enjoys his life as it is now. He has a little hottie who gets bored of her vanilla husband and comes over on the weekend and plays his slave. “From Friday night until Sunday afternoon, she can’t even take a piss without getting my permission.”

When she leaves on Sunday, his home is spotless; the laundry is done and put away. He’s exhausted. Everything is how he likes it, and he doesn’t have to do anything. She goes home well-used and even abused.

He seemed proud that as she left, he could see that her butt was black and blue. Sometimes well fucked as well. “It’s not all about sex, whips, and chains for me.” I was shocked. That was the first time I heard a man say it wasn't about sex!

After that, he has the house to himself again. He can have his friends over. A couple of the ladies are friends with benefits. It’s great. He saw no reason to change.

“ If I were to take on a slave, she would be my slave. Nothing more. And she will fit into my life 100%. “

At that point, I thought for sure the entire restaurant could smell my sex. I was dripping wet and wanted more of what he was telling me.

His Life

I provided him with more details. “This is where I lose the somewhat serious ones,” he told me. They want the storybook scenes, not the details. I explain where they would fit into my life if I took them on as slaves. That's when they freak out and start to call me nasty names.”

He said that if He had a slave, she would be more in the background.

They need to fit into his life, not the other way around. She would always be naked in private; the entire house is considered private. His house would be kept neat and orderly. He would decide if, when, and where he would have sex with her. And maybe who would have sex with her? Meanwhile, he would keep his girlfriends and have sex with them as he wanted to.

“That's where I lose them. They want the slave part mixed with the fairytale romance part mixed with monogamy. That’s another reason I don’t have a wife or a steady girlfriend. They always want to have some control of their sexual lives. I say No.”

He went on to explain that he likes to be alone, so sometimes the slave will be quiet, curled up at his feet, or standing in a corner. He has a small group of friends who trust with his life, so the same would go that he would share his slave with them when they are visiting.

Her night would end once her chores were completed and the house was back to normal. Then, she would be allowed to sleep in his room. She had a separate bedroom for the nights he had his girlfriends over.

He would expect her to be intelligent and to hold her own if we wanted her in the conversation. She should also be fun and have a sense of humor—the vanilla stuff.

I smile at Him. “You put a lot of thought into this.”

“I don’t like wasting people’s time. So I get to the point. If you want to be my slave, you will be my slave. I rule the roost, or you can go home. I want a slave, but I don’t NEED a slave.”

There was a pause as I was still wanting to hear more.

“So, did I scare you off?”

“No, Sir, you did not.” Oops, I haven't used that word in two years!

I feared this strange person would somehow read my journals if I had a journal. But it was like he knew what I wanted before I told him.. It can’t be the same as what he wants, can it?

“Ok there, girl, time to tell the old man why you went celibate for two years, and what kind of a master would make you give it up?”

More to come.

…..

This is my life, and I love it.
Love,
Bitch slave

(please leave me your comments and thoughts or questions)